Geena Mons†er · @GeenaGaga
27th Sep 2010 from Twitlonger
@ladygaga,
Mama Monster,
I was ragged, curled up on the pavement, drying out and losing my color. I was saying goodbye with my tears, staining the cold stone beneath me with the salty liquid.
I was volatile, I wasn't my true self. I was a deadly chemical aching to explode. I looked in the mirror and saw mundane eyes, vicious eyes that looked like rain.
No one was out there for me. No one was going to save me. I was going to be alone like this forever.
That was when I saw her. My mother, my true mother. I was glued to the pavement that evening, and as the sun set my eyes opened and I saw her.
There, in front of me, was the most beautiful woman in the world. She had a light shining around her and her smile could have been the sun. In fact, I still believe it was the sun. Her hair was twirled around her face but her eyes were glowing beneath her long, elegant hanging eyelashes. Her lips were smooth and twisted like glass, and her skin was porcelain. It was my mother.
My blood puddled around her feet as she sang to me the most beautiful words of hope. She touched my cheek and I shook as I placed my hand over hers. She loved me. I'm not alone.
The monster in me screams to be heard. Because I was Born This Way.
_____________________
That was a piece I wrote for you. I write a lot in my free time, actually. And you are my biggest inspiration.
My name is Geena. I bet you get a million letters everyday telling you how amazing you are and how brilliant you are and how loved you are. And i hope you get the time to read this, or somehow you come across this and find the time to read it, because you are the most important thing to me. you helped me find who i am as a person, and as a little monster. i'm bisexual, and i started listening to your music two years ago, in 2008. since then, i have been able to tell my mom that i'm bisexual and our relationship has become so much better and i honestly couldn't have done it without you. i live in wisconsin, and although i am proud of where i'm from, i dream of getting out of here and becoming a performer. my dream is to sing on stage and to get the rush of looking out into a crowd, surrounded by bright lights and music. when i watch you perform, i get so emotional because i know the feeling you have, and i admire you so much for being who you are and doing what you do.
you are such a beautiful person inside and out- i can't even describe it. i went to my very first Monster Ball on September 2nd, 2010 in Milwaukee, and since then my life has never been the same. i have looked at everything differently and i can see the beauty in the littlest things. everything is inspiration. me and my best friend started up on the very top level, against the wall. a worker from the bradley center ended up giving us tickets to move closer to the stage. me and my friend thought we were only going to be moving down a level or something, but no. we ended up literally RIGHT next to the stage. mama monster, you saw me and my friend that night, you waved at us. i have never felt more emotion in my entire life. i was screaming and crying and singing and dancing at the biggest misfit party, and it was the most beautiful thing i was ever a part of. you are freedom, you are happiness, and you keep me alive each and every day.
after attending my first Monster Ball, i blow off everyone who makes fun of me. not a ton of people bring me down, but there's definitely some people that i walk past in the halls that scream at me and call me names and start rumors because i'm not what they want. i'm not like them. and i don't care. because i have millions of monsters in my monster family and i have the BEST mother monster in the entire world. i could be crying and destroyed, and all i have to do is play your music and your voice stops the tears. you take away the pain and i can never thank you enough in words. ever.
you also helped me meet new friends. friends that have become like sisters. friends that mean the world to me. a couple months ago, i met a girl named Paige and her friend Leigha, and i honestly can not imagine how i lived life without them. i talk to them every single day, about my happiness, sadness, my problems, my accomplishments. they keep me sane. and so do you.
you mean so much to me, i've grown so much as a person because of you. i love myself now and you taught me how to be strong. because of you, i have met so many fellow monsters that i've become friends with and talk to almost every single day. i love you so much, i can't even describe it in words. i need you.
i really hope you can find the time to read this. my life dream is to be able to meet you- i'm going to save up all of my money to come and be front row in one of your shows and get to meet you in a meet and greet. i want to tell you my story and i want you to know how much you mean to me. you are honestly my everything. i would do anything for you Mama Monster. You are my angel, heaven sent.
xo, i love you so much!
~Geena, one of your little monsters. (=